Episode 307: Hey Don, It’s Summer Again
The Boys of Summer, Don Henley, The Ataris, pencils, FMK, EPs, Casa Bonita, blink-182 plane crash versus cancer, funeral service for broken record player needles, apartments with no bath or shower, sickle versus umbrella, plus after show bonus audio.
Double X Quantimino
Do The Math: Did Don Henley earn The Ataris more than The Ataris earn The Ataris on Spotify?
Guestimation Unknown No. 2 – pencils
FMK: Catwoman, Poison Ivy, Harley Quinn
Recommended extended plays (EPs)
No tipping at Casa Bonita
Understanding in a plane crash
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Millennium-old Japanese temple offering funeral service for broken record player needles
Apartments with no bath or shower rising in popularity among young Tokyoites
Sickle-wielding attacker safely fended off by victim’s umbrella in Aomori
Burnt End: Burrito’s Prescription, Coupon Book, Guy Hair Counter
Deepfake Sponsors: Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added March 14th, 2024
Episode 306: Broheed
Coheed and Cambria albums ranked by The Burrito Bandito in response to The Hard Times article, finger d¡ck or d¡ck hand?, Mein Cumpf, cassettes, The Presidents, One hundred ten percent, Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Double X Quantimino
Let’s taco bout it – Every Coheed and Cambria Album Ranked article by The Hard Times
Finger d¡ck or d¡ck hand?
Mein Cumpf
Cassettes – nostalgia, Hanson, The Presidents
Ten percent
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Curses for sale on Japan’s leading flea market site Mercari
Japanese college student admits he robbed taxi driver, denies in court that he was rude about it
Domino’s Japan creates a bacon shake for dipping pizzas into
Deepfake Sponsors: Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added February 22nd, 2024
Episode 305: Test Our Gangster
Sneaky link, Zoot Suit Riot, walking around barefooted, Covenant Eyes, Frederick’s of Hollywood, Nick Cannon, 50 Cent, Wheel of Fortune, plane door, gross model, kidney stone, beer keys, a million pennies, 5 million yen, air for sale, tiny newspapers, samurai assassination plot
Double X Quantimino
Sneaky link
Zoot Suit Riot
Walking around barefooted
Covenant Eyes
Frederick’s of Hollywood
Nick Cannon Calls 50 Cent ‘Fat:’ ‘Now It’s Get Thick Or Die Fryin’
Guestimation Unknown – Wheel of Fortune viewers per week
This Is The Newz
‘I wondered what I’d done wrong in life,’ says man next to passenger who opened plane door on flight
Gross model reveals what remote-workers will look like in 2100
What if your d!ck had taste buds?
Sri Lanka doctors remove 5.26-inch, 1.76-pound kidney stone from patient
Beer kegs block Michigan highway after semi overturns
California family finds a million pennies while cleaning out old house
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
5 million yen in cash found in Otsu City dump
Air from 2022 for sale on Japanese flea market app Mercari
Tiny newspapers
“Get them drunk then chop off their heads.” Samurai’s assassination plot against U.S. envoys found
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added January 31st, 2024
Episode 322: Stay King, Drenched, Grease Artifacts, Measured in Meatspins, Closest Without Going Over
Pre-show
UBI, universal healthcare
Brian put a timestamp so this is why you have it now instead of six months from now
New year’s resolutions
Amazon aquarium accessories
Noah K
Double X Quantimino
In your prime could you have done it? – Since 1948, the 72-ounce Top Sirloin Dinner has been served free to anyone who can eat the entire steak and trimmings within one hour.
Price Is Right Rules
Dennis Douglas Dung nicknamed 3D
Slammich – our own custom sandwich
How much was Brian’s meal at Quiznos?
Quizno hack to not pay extra for guacamole
Twofer’s – a sandwich shop that sells half-and-half sandwiches
Costco cheesecake return
Is drywashing a thing? Wiping a spoon
Beef pizzle
Hack-a-dick
Gangrene feet
This Is The Newz
Single mother’s future in jeopardy after thief steals driveway
Pastor accused of trying to push McDonald’s cook’s head into deep fryer for ‘disrespecting’ his wife
Video shows man attack district court judge during sentencing
Ohio man shot in testes by ex-girlfriend says he still loves her
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Japanese life insurance company develops dating sim where you’re not supposed to get insurance
Bar explodes in Tokyo’s Shinbashi neighborhood
All-you-can-eat doughnuts at Mister Donut: How many can we eat in 60 minutes?
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added January 10th, 2024
Episode 304: Toss The Sauce
Carnevil, The House of the Dead, Etsy, milk glass, laundry frequency, finger lickin’ good, high flying birds and fearless flying frogs, motorcycle ride with one helmet, 23 cents, Lemon Party, neighbor sues over medical weed smell, drunk duck fights dog, three men and a giant inflatable duck, cocaine on Sonic hot dog, drunk politician doing pullups inside train, 85-year-old great grandmother virtual YouTuber, police mascot flipping bird stickers
Double X Quantimino
Carnevil or The House of the Dead?
Arthur the Arbiter – Item title and options mislead. An Etsy review.
Milk glass and Brian’s grandfather’s glass collection
The ‘no-wash’ and ‘low-wash’ movement – how often is your denim washed
“finger lickin’ good”
High flying birds and fearless flying frogs
Hypothetical Meta Analysis – motorcycle ride, one helmet
23 cents
Lemon Party documentary
This Is The Newz
Judge orders DC man to stop smoking medical weed at home after neighbor sues over smell
Duck walks into pub, drinks pint, fights dog, loses
Three men swept out to sea on giant inflatable duck
New Mexico woman finds cocaine on Sonic hot dog
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Drunk Japanese politician in trouble for doing pullups inside moving train
85-year-old great-grandmother from Hiroshima is Japan’s newest virtual YouTuber/idol
Tokyo couple caught making stickers with police mascot flipping bird
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added December 06th, 2023
Episode 303: Stranded on La Isla Surrounded by Celebrity Buttwater
Celebrity butt water, sock shoe, caramel, three fingers in the honeycomb, one comic book, Walmart version of Margot Robbie, car flies Dukes of Hazzard style, guillotine, Duck Hunt, eunuch maker’s frozen leg, Saitama thugs, calling police 2,060 times in 9 days, condombassador
Double X Quantimino
Celebrity butt water
sock shoe sock shoe or sock sock shoe shoe
Caramel
RHCP lyrics “Three fingers in the honeycomb”
Burrito has enough space in his bugout bag for one comic book to bring to La Isla – Spider-Man: Blue #6
knock-off of a knockout
“Dramatic body camera footage shows a car speeding down a Georgia highway, catching a tow truck ramp and flying about 120 feet through the air “Dukes of Hazzard”-style, authorities say. The driver survived the crash with serious injuries.”
This Is The Newz
Couple’s choreographed suicide by guillotine ends with heads rolling into fire altar
Deputies accuse man of using Nintendo ‘Duck Hunt’ pistol to rob a business
Man admits freezing leg of alleged ‘eunuch maker’ who was accused of broadcasting live castrations
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
“I’m the most famous thug in Saitama!” Japanese kids’ social media beef leads to beating, arrests
Saitama man arrested for calling police 2,060 times in 9 days to yell at them
14th-generation condom ambassador named by Japan’s Sagami Original
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added November 25th, 2023
Episode 302: Broken Palindrome
Tacos fall apart, that double space, The Taming of the Shrew, throwing out undies, $19 smash burger, movie soundtracks, Bomb Queen, Brazilian steakhouse, hiding in a store after close, seals stick eels up nose, tipping culture, Hot Pocket shooting, Plymouth Hoe palm trees, plastic egg tarts, Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Double X Quantimino
Plug In & Hate – “It’s ok if u fall apart sometimes. Tacos fall apart & we still love them”
That double space between a full stop and the next sentence
The Taming of the Shrew
When to throw out the undies
A $19 smash burger
One movie soundtrack to take to La Isla
Bomb Queen
Brazilian steakhouse
Hiding after close in a store of your choice
This Is The Newz
‘Make better choices’: Researchers beg endangered seals to not stick eels up nose
Influencer who created AI version of herself says it’s gone rogue and she’s working ‘around the clock’ to stop it saying sexually explicit things
TikTokers say tipping culture is getting ‘out of hand’ after a woman claimed a Ben & Jerry’s cashier got annoyed when she didn’t tip for a $2 cone
Man shot roommate in Kentucky for eating last Hot Pocket, police say
Plymouth Hoe palm trees cut down in sex and drugs crackdown
Morse – Vibration Messenger
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Egg tart vendor promises not to accidentally sell realistic plastic samples a third time
More than one in three Japanese working women in survey would rather be housewives
Man rides motorbike into lobby of Fukuoka police station, demands they crack down on rude driving
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added November 14th, 2023
Episode 301: Polysyllabic Immaturity
Weapons for The Purge, vuvuzelas, poker, lima beans, Honey Buns, $70 safety razor, Newz, one million bees, toe sucking, Martha Stewart, Boot Girls, BNN, precious metal fillings, candy from Grave of the Fireflies, Krispy Kreme doughnut burger
Double X Quantimino
Weapons of choice during The Purge
Vuvuzelas
Poker’s popularity, Strip Poker on USA Network
Lima bean, clitorati
Guestimation Unknown – Honey Buns
A $70 safety razor
This Is The Newz
Ajax man facing charges after obtaining sexual services and refusing to pay
One million bees released during tractor-trailer crash on I-10 Westbound and US-301
Man rescued from woods after sex game goes awry
Hilton Hotel manager arrested for waking up guest by sucking on his toes
Woman’s body found in Arby’s freezer
Driver tried to switch places with his dog on DUI stop in Colorado town, police say
Martha Stewart lands ‘historic’ Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover
Masturbation with ‘sex toy’ kills man; gets electrocuted with ping pong ball up his butt while jerking off
A ride with Boot Girls, 2 women challenging Atlanta’s parking enforcement industry
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Kyoto City planning to sell cremated people’s precious metal fillings for millions of yen
Candy from Ghibli’s Grave of the Fireflies disappearing as manufacturer goes out of business
Krispy Kreme adds doughnut burgers to its menu in Japan
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Tentative titles: “Meet the Wolves Halfway”, “The Ant and the Lima Bean”, “Innocence and Piggies”
Added November 01st, 2023
Episode 300: Flat Circle Omakase Symphony
Wrestling entrance songs, NDAs, time is an illusion / social construct / flat circle, the bar scene, boys and girls’ bikes, mermaid statue, drugs shipped to restaurant, $120K banana, penis surgery gone wrong, orgasm heard at LA Philharmonic concert, fish semen on the sushi menu, Betty at 92’s male striptease show, all-you-can eat cookie cafe, beautiful women on apartment visits, JP government seeks power to control AC remotely
Double X Quantimino
Wrestling entrance songs – Brian: Let’s Get Reptarded, Art: The War, GMN: Hero, Burrito: Simon Says
Reality show NDA
Entrance songs but only from James Bond movies
Time is an illusion and a social construct
Time is a flat circle
A homunculus amunculus
The bar scene
Boys and girls’ bikes
This Is The Newz
Mermaid statue causes stir in southern Italy
Man arrested after $3M worth of drugs shipped to restaurant
Banana drama: ‘hungry’ South Korean student eats $120,000 artwork
Man dies after penis enhancement surgery goes wrong
Woman’s ‘loud and full body orgasm’ heard during LA Philharmonic concert
Michelin star chef inspired to add ‘fish semen’ to the menu at high-end restaurant
Care home resident fulfills dream of watching male striptease show at 92
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Reminder: Japan has awesome all-you-can-eat cookies cafés
Tokyo real estate agency sends beautiful women with you on apartment visits for date-like mood
Japanese government seeking power to turn down private home air conditioners remotely
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added October 22nd, 2023
Episode 299: Rawr is my OwO | Chasing El Dorado | The Heat in the Meat | Stillborns Stay Born | Through Thiccc and Thin
Walnutmilk, Mylk, Mxlk, Rawr, OwO/UwU, 3½-hour long movie or live music performance, Avril, JTT, Utopia, Prions, How much until you have to let your pet go?, Jersey Mike’s charity contribution to Boners for Algernon, overthinking, Desiigner, penis for sale, claw machine, cooked bats, stillborn, police bunny, RoboDog, robot waiters, food prank
Double X Quantimino
Walnutmilk, Mylk, Mxlk
Rawr is my OwO
Three and a half hours of a live music performance or movie
Avril, JTT, Utopia
Cool band name? – Hotass Pedxphiles
Prions
How much until you have to let your pet go?
Guesstimation Unknown: Mike’s Way®
Boners for Algernon
Overthinking? Ruminating? Breathe.
This Is The Newz
Rapper Desiigner charged for masturbating aboard overseas flight
Man ‘tries to sell penis’ at Eastern Cape shopping mall
Boy, 13, gets stuck climbing into claw machine for prize
German officials seize cooked bats near Belgian border
Pair charged with throwing away ashes of stillborn infant
Baby Gooch: “I’m stillborn. I stay born. Go shop at Liz Claiborne.”
Officer Cottontail? Bunny joins the police force. Fur real.
RoboCop? No, RoboDog: Robotic dog rejoins New York police
Are robot waiters the future? Some restaurants think so
Japan police arrest 2 in food prank at beef bowl diner
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added October 13th, 2023