Episode 218: Stay Wrecked & Jealous For This
When everything you’ll get is everything that you’ve wanted. This all was only wishful thinking. You’re such a sucker for sweet talkers. You just need to keep us in mind as something larger than life.
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The end of a porn scene ending that bothered Gemini
Sh!ttiest song lyric
Burrito’s Nickelbox – Red Hot Chili Peppers and Our Lady Peace
This Is The Newz
Lion loses testicle after lionesses attack him for stealing their food
Man who allegedly stole $8,000 guitar by hiding it in his pants sought by police north of Toronto
Schoolboy loses both nipples after dare to freeze them with two cans of Lynx
24,000-year-old animal found alive, well and ready to reproduce
Woman reveals Hinge date requested $4 after second meetup fell through
Meet Wallace the first mule to win the British dressage competition
‘I do it for free’: Prolific sperm donor gives his seed away using Facebook
Burrito’s Nippon News
Hyogo man arrested for stalking woman through her bank account
Arson attempt by passenger on Japan’s Shinkansen shuts down bullet train line
Why work from home when you can work from a Japanese cat town?
What I Had For Lunch
After Party
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Added February 25th, 2022
Episode 217: The Great Monkey Escape
Your favorite radio show delivers entertaining commentary about 18-wheelers flipping over on highways, fast food, Japanese news, and other random but interesting topics to make your day that much better.
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Fermented hot sauce?
Top 10 hot sauces sold by Instacart by weight
Teen Mom Farrah Abraham shows off letters from fans in jail after offering to send jars of her own poop to OnlyFans subscribers
Hypothetical Meta-Analysis: Teen Dad
Brian’s 5-Point Red Flag Checklist
This Is The Newz
Monkeys escape after truck carrying 100 animals to a laboratory crashes in US
Truck carrying 30,000 pounds of diapers dumps on Highway 401
China brings back anal swab testing for COVID two weeks before Winter Olympics
McDonald’s employee shot in argument over discount
Hash Brown McMuffin? McDonald’s unveils fan-inspired ‘menu hacks’
Want to cover yourself in bologna? Oscar Mayer has a face mask just for you
Bereaved families fight to use deceased child’s sperm to be grandparents
Burrito’s Nippon News
Tokyo TV station skips ugly controversy over Princess Mako’s marriage, shows Blade instead
Post-election goat scandal rocks Japanese lawmaker
Pokémon doughnuts appear in Japan, with Eevee joining the new Mister Donut range!
What I Had For Lunch
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added February 20th, 2022
Episode 216: Corpulent Pancitas
These are the sounds of four dudes in a booth, a British voice-over lady, and an Italian pop-punk band joining together at Daddy Juice Energy Studio and creating an episode of The World’s First Quantimino™ Powered Podcast. You’re cordially invited to hear possibly the best entertainment that you’ll have all week.
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When We Were Young Festival
Bono Admits He’s “So Embarrassed” by U2’s Music
Gemini’s Nickelbox: U2
AVN award nominees for clever titles
Arthur’s fax “joke”
Gemini fashionista: slacks that are actually sweat pants
Arthur the Arbiter: Changing menu prices
This Is The Newz
Logan Paul Paid $3.5 Million for Rare Pokémon Cards. They Might Be Fake.
Israeli woman sues after unwittingly inspiring a sex doll
Model Says Drake Puts Hot Sauce In Condoms To Kill Sperm And Not Get Trapped
Japanese woman gives up baby, sues sperm donor for $3 million after learning he lied
Michigan man wins $402,063 lottery jackpot on 71st birthday
Burrito’s Nippon News
Elevator button factory tour in Japan knows EXACTLY what kids (and kids at heart) want to do
Kyoto police using targeted YouTube ads to warn would-be voyeurs
Burger King straight-up serves beef patties on their own in Japan for a limited time
What I Had For Lunch
Prone bone
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Added February 13th, 2022
Episode 215: The Feeling That It’s All a Lot of Oysters but No Pearls
There’s reason to believe maybe this year is better than the last. It’s one more day up in the canyons, and it’s one more night in Slam City. If you think you might come to the Beaded Curtain District, we think you should. Yeeahhh!
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Dog barking update: The Showdown
You’re demoing a new speaker system. What’s your go-to song?
How would your young adult self react if Gayle’s ABCDEFU was written about you?
Mosaic Massacre: Man uses AI to “destroy” censor mosaics in Japanese adult videos
Pocket Tupperware
Gemini went to Las Vegas
Checkout error, cashier’s fault
This Is The Newz
Las Vegas women accused of hiding stolen cash, Rolex in genitals
Two Florida Women Attack Man With Glitter, Face Felony Charges
Young Scandinavians Are Sticking Nicotine Pouches Up Their A$$es
Doctor who branded his initials on patients’ livers no longer allowed to practice medicine
Former preschool teacher who now makes a living as a BBW model on OnlyFans.
Pensioner murdered with crossbow was ‘taken advantage of’ by ‘conman’
Burrito’s Nippon News
New “boss’ treat” vending machines in Japan give out free drinks if you use them with a coworker
Burger King adds Clown Fries and craft buns soaked in butter to menu in Japan
The top 30 foods that go best with white rice, according to Japanese netizens
What I Had For Lunch
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Added February 06th, 2022
Episode 214: Paper Crowns and Barnacles
Your favorite part-time friends take you on a roller coaster ride on The World’s First Quantimino™ Powered Podcast with random discussion topics, news commentary, and food. Bring a change of clothes.
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What if you could approve or deny gravity? OR Is gravity clumsy or just me?
Jason Derulo Attacks Men After Being Called Usher
Melania or Throat Goat Reagan? no politics, just shear sexual conjecture
MFK with Pelosi, Boebert, and AOC
This Is The Newz
Meet the Man Who Married His Sex Doll
Fish fall from the sky during rainstorm in eastern Texas
Melania Trump to auction white hat and other items for $250,000 minimum bid
What It’s Like to Go Through Life As a Really Beautiful Woman
Soft toy that nibbles to relieve stress is unveiled at tech convention
Tenn. lawmaker apologizes after arguing with ref, ejection at HS basketball game
KFC to launch plant-based fried chicken made with Beyond Meat nationwide
What I Had For Lunch
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Added January 28th, 2022
Episode 213: High Heat, Baby!
Your fearless and greasy hosts bring a fun-filled round of DXQ, odd news commentary, BNN, and What I Had For Lunch on your favorite radio show.
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Burrito’s Nickelbox – “Even Flow” by Pearl Jam and “The One I Love” by REM
Wedgies
Brian asks for dog advice
This Is The Newz
Dad saddled with $20,000 credit card bill after daughter’s in-game spending spree on Genshin Impact
Bank hands out £130m in Christmas blunder
90 Day Fiance star selling farts in a jar hospitalised
San Antonio’s Pabst Blue Ribbon tweets New Year’s advice for sober followers: ‘Try eating ass!’
Woman found smuggling spider monkeys in duffel bag across U.S. border
Little Caesars’ Hot-N-Ready pizza no longer costs $5
North Korea claims Kim Jong Un’s dad invented the burrito
Burrito’s Nippon News
This Robo Chef will make you perfect fried rice without any need to lift a heavy wok
Ramen tea? Unusual drink is hot in more than ways than one
Bathe in the soothing golden waters of the Bathtime Manneken Pis yellow water gun kit
What I Had For Lunch
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz.
Added January 24th, 2022
Episode 212: Sally Philosophy
Grab your listening device and hang out with your all-time favorite part-time friends from Slam City on The World’s First Quantimino™ Powered Podcast. This could be the best part of your week. Why listen to a lukewarm podcast when you have the center of the sun right here?
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Digital detox.
Fara Day, a holiday for digital detox.
Getting “Chipotle’d”
Vending machine idea
The coupon king asks a coupon question to his non-couponer bros.
Steel drums: remembering the music from Girls Gone Wild commercials
Subject Matter Expert Generalist (SMEG)
Brian’s Couch: existential crises that arise in the middle of the night
Getting older
This Is The Newz.
Cat burglar: New Zealand pet steals bong, bag of white powder and lacy underwear
Mom Forces Kids To Hand Over Build-A-Bear They Made At Her Daughter’s Birthday Party
Taste the TV: Japan invents lickable screen to imitate food flavours
Audi steps in to give ‘Wheel of Fortune’ contestant a car after controversial loss
Metairie man caught deceiving babysitters into changing his diapers arrested for second time
Finnish Man Blows Up Tesla Car Instead of Replacing Battery
‘Bloodthirsty’ squirrel attacks 18 people in Welsh village
UPS driver kidnapped, packages stolen in brazen Atlanta heist
Myanmar model-actor Paing Takhon named world’s ‘Most Handsome Face,’ sentenced to jail in same week
What I Had For Lunch
What Gemini and Arthur Had For Dinner Without Brian and Burrito
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Audio Editor: Scotty Sanders
Assistant Producer: Jaymark Balenciaga
Added January 14th, 2022
Episode 211: Tamale Pilot in Wonderland
Ladies, gentlemen, and scholars! This entertaining show has what your ear holes need: assorted topics covered in humorous conversation, odd news commentary, and a guessing game involving food. The World’s First Quantimino™ Powered Podcast is recorded at the Thicccum Farmz Compound in the Beaded Curtain District.
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Brian tested positive for Covid but not feeling that sick.
Greasy finance guy, Geoffrey Oglesby
Whistler, trach hole
Tamale Pirate
Coffee grinds that you dip
Will Brian fly to Irvine, CA for Vagrant’s 25th Anniversary?
Pizza bowls
Gemini’s body is a temple and a wonderland
Big Swig pickle-flavored sparkling water
Did the Macarena create world peace?
Birkenstocks
How would you feel if you bought a scratch-off ticket for someone as a birthday present, and they won $1 million from it?
This Is The Newz.
Woman, 48, lives — and dates — as her 22-year-old daughter at university
Book returned to Illinois college library was 49 years overdue
Minnesota teen’s 4-inch mouth gape recaptures Guinness World Record
McDonald’s teen employee hopped through drive-thru window to save customer choking on a chicken nugget
Local school districts relieved as a Tik Tok threat of ‘national shoot up your school day’ ends with no shootings
A Papa John’s restaurant manager says he was fired after 13 years with the company for closing 3 hours early amid ongoing hiring and retention challenges
Dallas Police Oversight Board Wants To Know Why Officers Seized Woman’s Bag Of Cash At Love Field
(Tamale Pilot)
Gal Gadot Launches New Line of Healthier Mac and Cheese, GOODLES
Eric Clapton successfully sues 55-year-old German widow for listing bootleg CD on eBay for $11
What I Had For Lunch
Fred Flintstone Yabba Dabba Don’t
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Added January 10th, 2022
Episode 210: The Peculiar Neurodegenerative Inhabitants of the Kazawa Atoll
Your search for that conversation you needed to feel well again ends here. Quick thoughts, clever commentary, and endless chuckles are intended results of your part-time best friends having a great time with a tape recorder and some microphones.
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Who are you freeing? Cosby, Elon, Britney, Baha Men
Barking dogs
Skambag
True or false?: Applebee’s boneless wings dipped in Flamin’ Hot Cheetos
Burrito watches a sandwich artist struggle every time
This Is The Newz.
What Does the Internet Smell Like? Sweat and Uncomfortable Office Chairs, According to This New Cologne
Georgia waitress gets $10,000 in tips after customer’s Facebook post
Why Are People Tweeting That Nancy Reagan Was the ‘Throat Goat’?
Burrito’s Nippon Newz.
Yoga teacher and students meditating on paddle boards swept into the ocean, rescued by canoer
Japanese woman finds wallet with 1 million yen, does the right thing, then something even better
Kansai area people more genetically predisposed to liking coffee than elsewhere in Japan
What I Had For Lunch
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Added December 28th, 2021
Episode 209: Aquarium Cleaner
You are cordially invited to the best lunch table conversation in the Quantimino™. Take a seat with Gemini Jackson, Wes Burrito, Brian McFly, and Arthur Dood as they humor a captivated audience by deconstructing Earth’s hot topics and news headlines.
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DXQ Level Newz: This “90 Day Fiancé” Star Has Probably Made More Than Your Annual Salary In One Week By Selling Her Farts
Gemini proposes setting up an interview with an actual Show Me Your Feet Guy
Feetquently Asked Questions
The Arbiter makes amends with Thigh Stop
Cherry Cordials
This Is The Newz.
Catalytic converter thief crushed to death by Toyota Prius
Ex-McDonald’s worker ‘disturbed’ after discovering raunchy Ronald McDonald toy
Woman delivered her own baby in car travelling at 60mph
Man Lifts His Sleeping Ex-Girlfriend’s Eyelids to Unlock Her Phone, Stealing $24,000
Burrito’s Nippon Newz.
New foot bath boots bring the healing waters of a Japanese onsen to your home
Newly appointed Minister of the Environment found following adult-oriented Twitter accounts
Official Pokémon furniture line launches with Pikachu Sofa and Poké Ball table
What I Had For Lunch
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz.
Added December 23rd, 2021