Episode 288: Waxing Gibbons
Lasagna hogs, tuna, MeToo’d, tipping robots, a re-enactment at a gas station, Kadabra, LVTOFU, woodcocks, condom-wrapped banana extraction, $295K for a testicle, quolls, $1.5M in stolen chicken wings, fast food Newz, a wearable beanbag, real-time shade info, Ice Whopper, and Yakuza-theme love hotel rooms.
Double X Quantimino
Palindromes follow-up: “go hang a salami, I’m a lasagna hog”
Tuna salad vs tuna sushi
Hypothetical Meta Analysis – Slam City Gets MeToo’d
The easiest answer to a not-so-deep dive – Should you tip a robot? But the real matter here: Service charges!?
Re-enactment – Gas station staff left horrified after finding severed human penis in car park
This Is The Newz
Kadabra Will Finally Return To Pokémon Card Game After 18-Year Ban
Texas DMV rejects vegan license plate for ‘vulgar’ phrase
Bird charity locked out of Twitter after woodcock tweets
Surgeons extract condom-wrapped banana man ate in ‘hormonal rage’ fit
Man who lost testicle from getting hit by supervisor awarded more than $295,000
Sex and no sleep may be killing endangered quolls
Vera Liddell allegedly stole $1.5M in chicken wings from Illinois schools
Salty strike: Arby’s employees quit after posting vulgar message on restaurant sign
A Chick-fil-A restaurant’s traffic got so bad that city officials ordered it to be demolished and plan to build a new drive-thru-only location
Burger King’s Latest International Menu Item Does Not Sound Very Appetizing…Or Does It
Wearable Beanbag becomes a hot topic in Japan
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Real-time shade information added to walking app from Navitime Japan
World’s first Ice Whopper on the menu at Burger King Japan
Yakuza-themed love hotel rooms! Great for couples, friends, and business meetings, owners say
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added June 29th, 2023
Episode 287: Infinity Monkeys
Experiencing music, ChatGPT, an infinite amount of monkeys, Spectrum, time machine, okay, bathing with bottled water, butt bumping on Wheel, Pokemon Yellow, a hot triple amputee model, Amouranth, toilet-shaped plants, Viagra, skipping commercials, the world’s greatest stereo system, stolen Rolex, BNN follow-up, Starbucks creampie
Double X Quantimino
Best experience: listening to the album, listening to a live recording, or attending a live performance?
ChatGPT
Art the Arbiter – Arthur prefers to not have to wipe his ass with cold hard cash. Charter Communications (Spectrum) are crooks.
Time travel never gets old. 🐱 Time Machine
Minutiae Moment – O.K., okay?
Gemini Jackson Does The Math
Pat Sajak’s Epic Reaction After a ‘Wheel of Fortune’ Contestant “Twerked” on Him
This Is The Newz
An original, sealed copy of Pokemon Yellow worth almost $10,500 has reportedly been ruined by US customs
I’m a triple amputee and a hot model — nothing holds me back
The Surprising Reason Twitch Star Amouranth Hasn’t Ditched NSFW Content (Yet)
These Toilet-Shaped Carnivorous Plants Thrive By Eating Poop
Viagra users are 25% less likely to suffer early death
Sony patent would have you yell at your TV to skip commercials
The world’s greatest stereo system is inside a Virginia home
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Saitama man’s 7M-yen Rolex stolen after leaving it alone with “potential buyer” for two minutes
Man who took entire town’s COVID-19 money now out of jail and turning life around
Starbucks Japan’s new cream pie’s looks are freaking people out
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added June 21st, 2023
Episode 286: Rabbit Season
Midnight snacks, palindromes, 27 years at Burger King, Get 1 Free deals, 400 pushups, pay yourself first, Papa Johns, Evo Moment #37, Corn Flakes, ramen’s history, Newz, BNN, and maybe more than most podcast listeners can handle.
Double X Quantimino
Midnight snacks
Palindromes
Working at Burger King for 27 years with perfect attendance
Buy 3, Get 1 Free
400 pushups for punishment
Bad money habits – pay yourself first with at least 10% into savings?
Was the apostrophe so wet that it fell off!?
Evo Moment #37
Kellogg’s Corn Flakes were created as an ‘anti-masturbatory morning meal’?
Reloading a location-specific payment card
Arthur’s revised thoughts on ramen
This Is The Newz
Recent rains cause Whiskeytown Lake to spill into the Glory Hole
Man accused of shooting other man after oral sex meetup in Florida City
Billionaire Larry Ellison got a speeding ticket on an island he owns while driving a Corvette and told the cop there’s ‘no excuse’
FEMA fires group for nonsensical Alaska Native translations
Amazon delivery driver’s fingertip is left in letterbox after accident
Man arrested for having sex with cow, sent to psychiatrist
“Boy Meets World’s” William Daniels Was In An “Open Marriage” With His Wife Before One Of His Affairs “Devastated” Her
Southbound I-71 reopens after beer truck overturns
Girl, 13, leads Nebraska troopers on 100 mph chase with boy, 11, in the passenger seat
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
69-year-old Tokyo man arrested for driving without a license for over 50 years
Monkeys have attacked more than 60 people in three weeks in one Japanese town
Krispy Kreme releases tit doughnuts in Japan
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added June 12th, 2023
Episode 285: The Pursuit of Greasiness
Clams, Clam Aiken, lines, tipping, Deftones, flood, Godzilla, cheddar cheese, Napoleon Bonaparte, used sweaters, haggling at Goodwill, dumb phones, the purple dot, cheesy pizza, Spider-Man #14 Angry Girlfriend Variant, Hello Fresh, pigeons with backpacks, jzz cupcakes, Asahi Beer image girls, Booty Royale, and more odd news stories.
Double X Quantimino
Let me tell you about this clam
A question about tipping
How willing would you be to wear a sweater that had previously been worn by a man who’d been “tainted” in some way: infected with tuberculosis, survived a car accident (misfortune taint), or convicted of murder (moral taint)?
Hypothetical Meta Analysis – Ride or Die?, Part 1: Sergio Vega Deftones contract
Ride or Die?, Part 2: A flood will destroy your living space soon and you need to evacuate. You only have time to take what you can carry on yourself. What are you taking?
Guestimation Unknown, Part 1: When Napoleon Bonaparte died, apparently his doctor cut off his penis for the autopsy. In 1977, the penis was eventually sold for how much?
Guestimation Unknown, Part 2: How many pounds of cheddar cheese did the US produce in 2014?
How willing would you be to wear a sweater that had previously been worn by a man who’d been “tainted” in some way: infected with tuberculosis, survived a car accident (misfortune taint), or convicted of murder (moral taint)?
Considering the Light Phone II
Boobs vs Butts
Romeo and Juliet (1968 film)
The Amazing Spider-Man #14 Angry Girlfriend Variant
This Is The Newz
Delivery driver left box full of Hello Fresh food on top of sleeping baby
Pigeon wearing crystal meth ‘like a backpack’ caught inside B.C. prison yard
Six journalists arrested over footage of South Sudan president wetting himself
Louisiana deputy sentenced to 100 years in prison for ejaculating on cupcakes, other crimes
Indian Held for Unruly Behavior With Woman on Airline Flight
Woman with unfortunate initials fed up of being mistaken for a sandwich
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Asahi Beer abolishes “image girl” spokesmodel position, ending practice at big four brewers
Survey finds obesity rates fell, but eyesight worsened among Japanese schoolchildren
No longer able to draw breasts due to family circumstances, manga artist retires
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added June 05th, 2023
Episode 284: We’re Going To A Party
Gemini, Brian, and Arthur discuss beefy farts, jzzn blood, meeting their 15-year-old selves, a lifetime of loadz, toothpicks, hyperemployment, power napping, fortune cookies, and odd news. Bring a change of clothes.
Double X Quantimino
Yuh boyz chuckle about fartz – Ref: haven’t had beef in a while
If you had to choose: jzz blood OR jzz white but get brainfreeze every time?
Ripped from a tweet: “You got to meet your 15-year-old self for 30 seconds. What would you tell them?”
Guestimation Unknown – A lifetime of loadz
Minutiae Moment – toothpicks
Arthur the Arbiter – “Hyperemployment offers a subtly different way to characterize all the tiny efforts we contribute to Facebook and Instagram and the like… We do tiny bits of work for Google, for Tumblr, for Twitter, all day and every day.”
Power napping
Fortune cookie fortunes
This Is The Newz
Man who gorged 124 kebabs in a month says it left him ‘psychologically’ damaged
Paige Spiranac tells fans looking at her boobs is good for their health
Lottie Moss strips naked for racy shots and says body ‘is there to be enjoyed’
From the McRib to the Choco Taco, 6 foods we lost – Burger King’s Ch’King, Chili’s Original Chicken Tenders, Choco Taco, Honest Tea, McDonald’s McRib, Wendy’s Vanilla Frosty
Melted butter clogs historic canal and storm drains after dairy plant fire in Wisconsin
Nevada parents sue school district over daughter’s ‘pornographic’ assignment
I stopped taking the pill — now I’m gay
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added May 26th, 2023
Episode 283: Cartesian Others
Gemini, Brian, and Arthur discuss traffic, sheets, Ramones, Elizabeth Holmes, panhandlers, a $10 breakfast, weighted blankets, Tevin and Kevin, brain-altering parasites, a $1,000 tip, imported sex dolls, and more odd news.
Double X Quantimino
You are the law. If you had the superpowers to enforce traffic or deliver your own justice, would you?
Sheets
The KKK Took My Baby Away
Hypothetical Meta Analysis – Elizabeth Holmes, Toxic Ladyboss
Giving a Crispy Chicken Sandwich with Extra Crinkle-cut Pickles to a Panhandler
Arthur the Arbiter – Look, I get it BUT Eggs Any Style $10?! Two farm fresh eggs any style, homemade biscuit, choice of bacon or house sausage
This Is The Newz
Target recalls children’s weighted blankets due to 2 asphyxiation deaths
Florida Man Beat Roommate’s Raccoon with Hammer, Threatened to Kill Neighbor with Sewing Needle
McDonald’s delivers empty wrapper to man who unticked every item on his order
M&S executive caught with ecstasy pills and cocaine stuffed inside bra in Fabric
‘Toxic masculinity’ may be caused by an actual, infectious, brain-altering parasite
Florida server surprised with $1,000 tip
Carjackers interrupt couple having sex, leave them naked in the streets
South Korea ends ban on imported sex dolls
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added May 18th, 2023
Episode 282: Mercury Lacks Moons
Gemini, Burrito, and Arthur play a round of Guestimation Unknown then discuss littering, Janeane Garofalo, an 80-hour workweek, wi-fi passwords, grocery prices, Newz, groin itch treatment, and double French toast.
Double X Quantimino
Guestimation Unknown: Huy Fong Sriracha
Arthur almost littered
Keep your name or change it? Hoar
Jen Ecks
Yesterday (2019 film)
Attempting tirelessness AKA Elon’s “hardcore” – 80 to 100 hours a week, every week
The wi-fi password
Grocery store sadness
This Is The Newz
Fake psychic, partner sentenced in $3M fraud scheme
Jury Sides With Big Cheese in Mozzarella Family Feud
Cocaine found in car’s secret compartment during traffic stop
Man hurls wine bottles at NJ liquor store workers who didn’t give him discount
Philadelphia police searching for suspect who stole antique brass railing outside City Hall
Snakes have a clitoris: scientists overcome ‘a massive taboo around female genitalia’
How the chicken lost its penis
Scientists invent 1st ‘vagina-on-a-chip’
‘Finally, my order will be quick and accurate’: McDonald’s fully-automated location with no human employees sparks debate
Man with WWI explosive lodged in his rectum sparks bomb scare, hospital evacuation
Overturned truck spills load of hams, various meats in North Carolina
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
New spreadable French Toast from Japan is a game-changer
Crotch Cup 2022 eSports festival held to raise awareness for groin itch treatment
Miyagi senior’s joke bombs so hard it delays a flight for 50 minutes
Burnt End: Double French Toast After Party
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added May 15th, 2023
Episode 281: Full Lizard feat. Jonathan the Tortoise
Gemini, Burrito, Brian, and Arthur drop some conversation and chuckles about massage therapy, rifle cleaning, hirsutism, ill-equipped restrooms, escaping a time loop, Ketchup Karen, Jonathan the Tortoise, funny T-shirt ideas, train rides, more odd news, and The Three Rules.
Double X Quantimino
Massage therapy from dudes
How to clean your rifle
Hairy limbs
Hypothetical Meta Analysis – An ill-equipped public restroom
Stuck in a time loop, 3.2 seconds, Palm Springs
Your face is like a fingerprint, and Lensa AI is nefarious.
Window seat or aisle?
This Is The Newz
‘Didn’t she ask for extra ketchup? Why is she mad?’: McDonald’s ‘Ketchup Karen’ throws fit over amount of ketchup on her burger
Poker player with ‘boobs out’ promises to ‘nip that behavior in the bud’
Pig hogs bed in Georgia woman’s home: ‘She steals my pillow’
Wordle is 2022’s top Google search term, above both Ukraine and the queen
Home Depot workers track down owner of dropped $700 cash
Jonathan the tortoise, oldest living land creature, celebrates 190th birthday
Book returned to Australian school library was nearly 120 years overdue
I’m so pretty, men treat me like a trophy and women scowl at me
Hooters influencer Ali Spice dead at 21 in car crash
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Cases of people getting unwanted crabs skyrocketing in Japan, salmon too
Japan’s random-destination roll-the-die train tickets: An amazingly cheap way to go… somewhere
Over half a million yen in cash comes floating down river in Toyama
The Three Rules
Rule #1: Overcomplicate Things.
Rule #2: Go Fvck Myself.
Rule #3: n + 1
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added May 08th, 2023
Episode 280: Under The Influence of Brisket and Pasghetti
Gemini, Brian, Burrito, and Arthur discuss maid cafés, bot bigotry, a busy intersection, “Self Esteem” by The Offspring, tipping, ordering at Starbucks, odds news, and Nippon news.
Double X Quantimino
Slam City Maid Café Menu & Daily Specials
Bot bigotry
Dr Smahtman explains a cognitive psych study about tools
Plug In & Hate, Part 1: Stop behind the white line
Deep dive on the lyrics to “Self Esteem” by The Offspring
Disney Files Patent for Roller Coaster that Jumps Track
We ain’t playin’ with this campaign. People are tipping less in this economy, but why are they tipping at all?
Plug In & Hate, Part 2: A woman went viral on TikTok after sharing how she was late to her doctor’s appointment because a customer ordered 38 drinks at Starbucks.
This Is The Newz
Man gets jump-rope stuck in bladder after shoving it into his penis
Hot dog vendor stabbed in alleged turf-war with another hot dog vendor outside Petco Park
Ex-ExxonMobil employee arrested after ‘vault’ of upskirt photos allegedly discovered
Alameda Co. deputy arrested on suspicion of DUI after totaling ‘BBQ’ truck
Houston woman has the world’s largest feet
Hacked digital billboard in Brisbane displays pornography for several minutes
Someone paid over $200,000 for the Birkenstocks that Steve Jobs wore in the garage where he founded Apple
Evacuation orders lifted after hemp plant fire in Grass Valley
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Japanese company uses video game-style hit point badges to help employees know who need a hand
Saitama man arrested for making 9,313 false reservations on luxury trains
AirTag planted on Aichi Prefectural Police car, by someone who doesn’t understand cars well
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Added April 28th, 2023
Episode 279: Skipping Rocks
Gemini Jackson, Brian McFly, The Burrito Bandito, and Arthur Dood share an hour of conversation and laughter covering assorted topics for your listening pleasure. Bring a change of clothes.
Double X Quantimino
Hypothetical Meta-Analysis – Daddy Juice Energy scored us a ticket to an Anna Delvey Dinner Party and only one of us can go. Art selected Brian.
Feed the AI, a rapid fire deep dive segment – Memory maps, business hours, conscious time, and fuel consumption
Hypothetical Meta-Analysis – One of us allegedly gropes another podcaster that made a headline.
Have we been playing Super Mario Bros wrong our whole lives? None of us.
This Is The Newz
Sperm counts worldwide are falling even faster than we thought
‘Temporary vasectomy’ trialed in Melbourne: Sperm blocker a world first
Woman feels ‘dehumanized’ as she claims she was kicked off plane over 10kg boobs
TikTok artist entombs bag of Cheetos in 3,000-pound sarcophagus
HelloFresh accused of using coconut milk obtained from monkey labor
Raising Cane’s Chicken Fingers sues Indiana shopping center after being told it can’t sell chicken fingers
Man who found £4 million cheque to Haribo rewarded with gummies
Your favorite songs reveal your attachment style: New psychology research
Wait, Are We Really Supposed to Tip 25% Everywhere Now?
Woman Cops To Meat Beating At Ohio Walmart
Burrito’s Nippon Newz
Japan’s first-ever wanko soba conveyor belt restaurant opens in Tokyo
Tokyo man arrested for putting brother’s skull out for recycling collection
Gifu man arrested for entering other person’s home and hanging women’s underwear to dry
Deepfake Sponsors: Julio Tejas, Booba Gettz The Crazy One, Thicccum Farmz
Slam City Radio 24/7 x https://slamcity.co/scr247/
Added April 19th, 2023